Work
I asked the boss if I could leave early.
They said yes. It was 6pm.
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Why don't some offices have a clock?
Because time is money, and they already spent it.
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What's the best thing about a standing desk?
You can sit on the news that you stood.
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Why did the meeting take an hour?
Someone said 'quick question' at minute fifty-eight.
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How does a printer say hello?
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I told my colleague a joke about unemployment.
They said it wasn't working.
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Why did the stapler go to school?
To become a stapler with a degree. It still only holds paper together.
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What's an office worker's favourite kind of music?
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I updated my résumé.
It now includes 'survived reply-all'.
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How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?
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I don't have a job. I have a calling.
It keeps going to voicemail.
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Why did the coffee file a complaint?
It was tired of being roasted in meetings.
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